This Week

This week I’ve unexpectedly developed the dreaded moon face. In other words, the steroid given in every infusion has caught up with me. My face has become quite round. Why this has happened now (two weeks out from my last infusion) and in just a couple days is a mystery to me.

I had hoped that with the infusions reduced to once every three weeks since March, I could avoid moon face. Alas, not so.

Doing a little Internet research, I discovered that steroids also can redistribute fat to the belly. That solves the mystery of why my belly keeps looking bigger even though I have not gained weight. (I suppose that one perk of having cancer is that my oncologist and primary care doctor don’t want me to lose weight.)

Sometimes I wish I could go incognito with my cancer, but now I see it would take more work and discomfort than I am willing to endure. Wigs are uncomfortably hot. Plus, since my eyebrows and eyelashes are virtually nonexistent, I would need to draw on eyebrows and see if fake eyelashes would fasten to my eyelids. That would mean wearing makeup to avoid looking totally ridiculous. Too much hassle.

Since it is obvious with my hats that I am bald, I may yet get brave enough to be bald in public.

Several weeks ago, my four-year-old grandson said with the certainty that only young children possess, that I was not a girl. I assume he came to that conclusion because I am bald. On the other hand, he regularly tells me that I am beautiful. And I found out last week that he thinks I am five years old! Of course, there was the time that he patted my tummy and said “Baby?”

No, baby, but I’m holding on to the idea that bald is beautiful!