The Desert Fathers often referred to
it. Kathleen Norris wrote a book about
it. Therefore, I must be in good company
because I’m in the middle of it: acedia, “the noonday demon.”
Translated into plain old English, acedia is a siege of spiritual lethargy. Mental health experts call it depression. Fibromyalgia sufferers call it fibro fatigue. An article I just read calls it one possible
result of oxidative stress (http://www.fmnetnews.com/latest-news/getting-to-the-root-of-fibromyalgia). I call it all of the above.
Each morning I vow to overcome it,
and I do: from mid-morning to noon. About the time the sun is shining the
brightest, my batteries need recharging, and they don’t seem to be
solar-powered. I plod through another
unproductive day, and the stack on my desk grows a little deeper, the kitchen
grows a little messier, and the dust bunnies grow a little larger.
I could be working on writing-related
projects that I normally love: blogging,
editing our church history project, proofreading my daughter’s book
manuscript. Sometimes I manage a little
time on one of those during the afternoon.
But by evening I am ready to play computer solitaire while I watch the
news and then read for a few hours.
Whatever you want to call it, I am trying to get over it. Yesterday I
took a walk on the beach, enjoying the sun and brisk breeze, the sound of waves
breaking, and the sight of seagulls gathering.
Today I bagged up clothing items that I either never wear or that no
longer fit me. Tomorrow I’ll go to one
of the farmer’s markets in the area.
Right now I’m thinking of what will
be easiest to make for supper. After we
eat, I’ll watch the news, finish the novel I started reading last night, and do
my devotions at bedtime. I do not like
the spiritual doldrums, but the book I’m reading on praying the 23rd
Psalm reminds me that the Shepherd is near even when he seems far away. I hope that if I keep listening, I’ll hear
his voice.
No comments:
Post a Comment