Part Thirty-One: Sicker Than I Knew

I was pushed back and about to fall,

but the LORD helped me.

The LORD is my strength and my song;

he has become my salvation.

(Psalm 118:13-14)

            I did not know how sick I was.  True, I wondered if I could get out of bed.  True, my fever was back up over 100 again.  And, true, I felt horrible.  But I did not know I was short of breath.  And I did not know I had pneumonia.   

At Jane Phillips that Friday night, I opted for a wheelchair to get me from car into ER.  My daughter and I waited for what seemed a long time, but once the intake person found my blood oxygen level to be a mere seventy, I got wheeled back into a cubicle and hooked up to oxygen fast.  Then the wheels of ER turned more slowly, and it wasn’t until 3 a.m. that I was loaded up in an ambulance to take me to the Oklahoma Heart Institute ICU at Hillcrest.

This was not how I had planned on spending Labor Day Weekend, but I was in good hands.  The staff was amazing, providing excellent care, professional competence, and loving compassion.  Antibiotics and steroids, tests and more tests, and breathing treatments filled each day.  On Tuesday, I was moved from the cardio ICU to the ninth floor oncology unit and no longer needed oxygen.  On Wednesday, the physical therapist got me up and using a walker.  On Friday, I was discharged. 

So here I am at home, grateful to sleep in my own bed without the interruptions of blood draws, breathing treatments, and vital signs checks.  Earlier this summer, I often felt like my home was a prison.  Now, after three days in ICU and four days in a regular hospital room, my home feels like freedom.  Breathing on my own, walking on my own, and regaining strength are precious gifts I did not know that I should cherish.   

I never knew it was possible to be so very sick and not know it.  It makes me think of how spiritually sick and lost we can be without knowing it.  It makes me more grateful than ever before that Jesus is our great physician.  He gave his life for us.  Not only do we have the promise of eternal life, but we can have abundant life in the present, too, no matter our circumstances. 

You are my God, and I will give you thanks;

you are my God, and I will exalt you.

Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good;

his love endures forever.

(Psalm 118:28-29)